This past weekend, my understanding and knowledge of the culture and history of Rwanda had greatly expanded. As a group, we visited the Institute of National Museum of Rwanda, Kings Palace, University of Rwanda and Murambi Genocide Memorial Center.

Before this program, I did not have a true understanding of this country and was not aware of the history that took place before the genocide. The museum showed me a new perspective into their beautiful and amazing culture that makes the country of Rwanda so neat and unique. I learned about items used in hunting, pottery and wood work, the social importance of cattle, and so much more. I was amazed and really enjoyed visiting the King’s Palace and it was a very cool experience to go into the actual palace that the king of Rwanda once lived.

The genocide museum was a very emotional and powerful experience for me. The Murambi Genocide Memorial Center takes place at a school that was being built during the time of the genocide and was still under construction. It strategically takes place on top of a hill in a quiet area that is very excluded from all else around. I was quite nervous going into it knowing we were going to a memorial with bodies of the victims that were not reburied but preserved and kept for visitors to see. I was nervous about the way I would feel and what emotions were going to come to the surface during my experience since I have never been to a genocide memorial like this before and I am a very sensitive and emotional person.

As I walked into the school where the memorial and many killings took place, I felt peace and sadness at the same time, which is a feeling I have never quite felt before. As we walked throughout the gallery indoors and read the captions on the walls of the timeline throughout history that had led up to the genocide, stories of survivors and brutal killings, I was able to feel the fear of the victims, especially the fear of the children. After we finished the gallery inside, we continued the tour of the museum outside, which included the room of the victims bodies preserved, a very deep grave filled with more than an thousand bodies, rooms filled with victims clothes for family members to identify their loved ones, and rooms and rooms of bones.

As we were walking into the room with the preserved bodies I felt a weight holding me back and I did not know if this is something I personally am able to see. I was told not to fail to try and instead try and it is okay to fail, so I took a brave step in, glanced at the first body, and felt tears coming to my eyes and a bad feeling in my body, which I knew it would be too much for me to see.

As we walked outside through the other rooms, I couldn’t help but think about how great this school could have been and sad for everything that happened. I thought about what could have been and why these horrible things happen to innocent people. Feeling fear and love at the same time is a very interesting feeling to have because I did not think they could both exist at the same time, but that is how I was feeling.

I am grateful to be able to see the memorial and send love and remembrance to the victims killed at the site and the every single victim that was killed during the genocide. My experience here and the stories of the victims will never be forgotten.